I have been getting ready for a book group that I am hosting about the Man Who Invented Christmas, referring to Charles Dickens and his "Christmas Carol". This idea about Christmas being invented is a bit of a paradigm shift. Christmas is something we have always done. It has something my family has always done. It's tradition! While it has been something in the making for 1600 years, it has been evolving and changing. It's hard to imagine it being as a time that was used for very different purposes than to celebrate Christ or doing good. I have already been trying to shed some of the culture-especially when it comes to Santa Claus but after watching/reading a few articles about the origins of Christmas and why we shouldn't celebrate Christmas makes me feel cautious about my celebrations. With all of the symbols and gift giving having its roots in paganism makes me question why we do what we do. I do believe we can attach the symbols to what ever fits our celebration-since it is us who decides what they mean. Religion is very heavy on the use of symbols so the fact that they may be the same symbols used by pagans doesn't mean they can't have different meanings or references.
So really, as I ponder the different decorations and activities we do, as long as it points to Christ, then celebrating Christmas is a very honorable thing to do.
One thing I can't quite tell how to relate entirely to Christ and the most distracting to the focus of Christ is gift giving. I know, there is the idea of being charitable, showing love and appreciation, spreading joy through gifts but there is so much of it that isn't just that. So much pressure, time, hunting for deals, selfishness even in the buying of the gifts with the deals they offer if you buy a certain thing. It's so hard to be genuine in the gift giving. When it comes to gift giving outside of my immediate family it also becomes harder and often feels more of an obligation. Is it just me?
I like this quote:
"I have always thought of Christmas time as...the only time I know of, in the long calendar of the year when men and women seem by one consent to open their shut-up hearts freely, and to think of people below them as if they really were fellow-passengers to the grave, and not another race of creatures bound on other journeys." The holiday "has done me good and will do me good; and I say, God bless it."
My hope for this Christmas season and future seasons is that I can peal away the pieces of Christmas that don't bring light, joy and increase my love and devotion for the Savior.
Wednesday, December 4, 2019
Thursday, November 28, 2019
To be thankful
All I have to do is look at my Instagram posts or my blog posts through the years to remember what I am thankful for and feel immense joy to have the life that I am living. And then there are the million other things in between.
Today a few things that are on my mind:
I am thankful for the spirit which whispers to me simple ways to improve. If anyone but the Spirit told me to change, I fear I am too proud. And the words of the Spirit seem to stay with me longer so that I can remember to change. For example, we all have parenting struggles (at least I sure hope we do and I am not alone!). As I was having a particular rough day with one of my children, I wanted nothing but to have space and run errands by myself after dinner. But as I sat at the dinner table facing my inner turmoil, I remember something the spirit whispered to me not too long before as I had pondered and prayed how to be a better mother to this particular child, "spend 15 minutes with her". So I invited her along to run errands with me. Nothing fun but we walked, held hands and talked. It is something I need to remember everyday.
I am thankful for the opportunity to see tithing as sacrifice. So many times I pay it and think nothing of it. But as I have found myself wanting more and feeling like it was something out of our budget, the thought came, "Man, if we didn't pay tithing we could afford it." A scary temptation. However, it is a sacrifice that has and will continue to bring the blessings of heaven. Yesterday, I listened to a talk "Becoming a Disciple of our Lord Jesus Christ" by Elder Hales from 2017. He said people practiced what he called "selective obedience" and the line that stuck out to me "They gave alms to the poor but offered only heir excess--what they did not need for themselves." I don't know this sacrifice. I don't know how to give what I don't need. Anyway, I'm glad I could see an opportunity of a way I can and have sacrificed as I learn to give more freely.
I am thankful for life. I feel that I am recognizing the mortality of the people around me. A sister in my ward was diagnosed with cancer-She has an amazing fighting spirit. A brother in my ward passed away last night- GG was there in the hospital with their family. A few days ago, they probably had no idea anything big was going to happen. Facebook fills my feed with the struggles of my friends. At stake conference last week, I looked around and saw a number of gray haired and older people. I realized these were my friends parents. Another generation is raising up and another moving to another season of life. I'm in the middle right now but it won't be long before I am that older generation. How does time and life seem to slip by like a dream?
I am thankful for my ability to exercise. I love it. It feels good to be stronger. It feels good to do something I don't think I can or even want to in the moment. It is wonderful practice for life.
I am thankful for food. I am thankful for comfort, security, love and belonging.
I am thankful for 4 children who call me mom.
I am thankful for a wonderful, devoted and serving husband.
I am thankful for my upbringing and the sacrifices my parents had to raise a family. They gave up a lot to have as many children as they did.
I am thankful so many things. It's easy to feel thankful. The real test is to BE thankful, to act thankful. To be so thankful, that I would give even in my want.
Today a few things that are on my mind:
I am thankful for the spirit which whispers to me simple ways to improve. If anyone but the Spirit told me to change, I fear I am too proud. And the words of the Spirit seem to stay with me longer so that I can remember to change. For example, we all have parenting struggles (at least I sure hope we do and I am not alone!). As I was having a particular rough day with one of my children, I wanted nothing but to have space and run errands by myself after dinner. But as I sat at the dinner table facing my inner turmoil, I remember something the spirit whispered to me not too long before as I had pondered and prayed how to be a better mother to this particular child, "spend 15 minutes with her". So I invited her along to run errands with me. Nothing fun but we walked, held hands and talked. It is something I need to remember everyday.
I am thankful for the opportunity to see tithing as sacrifice. So many times I pay it and think nothing of it. But as I have found myself wanting more and feeling like it was something out of our budget, the thought came, "Man, if we didn't pay tithing we could afford it." A scary temptation. However, it is a sacrifice that has and will continue to bring the blessings of heaven. Yesterday, I listened to a talk "Becoming a Disciple of our Lord Jesus Christ" by Elder Hales from 2017. He said people practiced what he called "selective obedience" and the line that stuck out to me "They gave alms to the poor but offered only heir excess--what they did not need for themselves." I don't know this sacrifice. I don't know how to give what I don't need. Anyway, I'm glad I could see an opportunity of a way I can and have sacrificed as I learn to give more freely.
I am thankful for life. I feel that I am recognizing the mortality of the people around me. A sister in my ward was diagnosed with cancer-She has an amazing fighting spirit. A brother in my ward passed away last night- GG was there in the hospital with their family. A few days ago, they probably had no idea anything big was going to happen. Facebook fills my feed with the struggles of my friends. At stake conference last week, I looked around and saw a number of gray haired and older people. I realized these were my friends parents. Another generation is raising up and another moving to another season of life. I'm in the middle right now but it won't be long before I am that older generation. How does time and life seem to slip by like a dream?
I am thankful for my ability to exercise. I love it. It feels good to be stronger. It feels good to do something I don't think I can or even want to in the moment. It is wonderful practice for life.
I am thankful for food. I am thankful for comfort, security, love and belonging.
I am thankful for 4 children who call me mom.
I am thankful for a wonderful, devoted and serving husband.
I am thankful for my upbringing and the sacrifices my parents had to raise a family. They gave up a lot to have as many children as they did.
I am thankful so many things. It's easy to feel thankful. The real test is to BE thankful, to act thankful. To be so thankful, that I would give even in my want.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Friday, November 22, 2019
years
okay, just a quick note (I make no promises).
I know I have been away from my blog for a long time now and have only made a post or two in the last several years. I happened to look at the side bar of my blog at blogs I used to follow. Do you remember the NieNie Dialogues/diary(?? something like that). I clicked on it, not realizing she still blogged while in my absence from the blog world. Her post had her 18 year old daughter!! Shut the front door! Her kids were all little, moving into a nice big house as Utah bloggers do and now she has an almost adult.
It makes me sick. Why do the years fly by so quickly. Right now, I have two children pulling on a cord of a disco light fighting on who will plug it in, neither willing to give in and to reach the same goal of dancing with the lights--this is why the years have to fly by quickly or we might not make it. But this stage in our lives will be gone so quickly. I find it hard to even remember day to day life when Boo was little. And it 10 years I look back it will all seem to be a dream. And then where will we be? I realize I am no longer 27 and I should start accepting my age and my body, while stronger does not look like a 27 year old anymore. And that the idea of being a grandma, yes I just said grandma, is not a completely outlandish idea for my future-it is a little but not completely.
I know I have been away from my blog for a long time now and have only made a post or two in the last several years. I happened to look at the side bar of my blog at blogs I used to follow. Do you remember the NieNie Dialogues/diary(?? something like that). I clicked on it, not realizing she still blogged while in my absence from the blog world. Her post had her 18 year old daughter!! Shut the front door! Her kids were all little, moving into a nice big house as Utah bloggers do and now she has an almost adult.
It makes me sick. Why do the years fly by so quickly. Right now, I have two children pulling on a cord of a disco light fighting on who will plug it in, neither willing to give in and to reach the same goal of dancing with the lights--this is why the years have to fly by quickly or we might not make it. But this stage in our lives will be gone so quickly. I find it hard to even remember day to day life when Boo was little. And it 10 years I look back it will all seem to be a dream. And then where will we be? I realize I am no longer 27 and I should start accepting my age and my body, while stronger does not look like a 27 year old anymore. And that the idea of being a grandma, yes I just said grandma, is not a completely outlandish idea for my future-it is a little but not completely.
Thursday, November 14, 2019
Making progress
I was driving home from the Y and I somehow the thought of my old blog came to mind. I could barely recall the web address, thankfully I remembered the original blog name and found my most current one.
I feel like I am more of a complete person when write and share my life. I have been sporadically writing in a journal but I never look at it and its not nearly as fun to look at without pictures. So I am once again going to attempt to blog again. Out of curiosity, is there anyone who isn't a professional blogger out there still?
So what to share?
I have been a member of the Y for a year and a half and I can say I have improved my running, mostly in the last 11 months, from a slightly 9 something minute down to 8 1/2 minute mile. Yay! Still working on running for longer. Slowly but surely. I can at least say I don't hate it and that I don't feel like my heart is going to race right out of me.
We are contemplating finding a bigger house. We found we like but there a few things holding us back. Until we ready we went into full get the house ready to sell mode. I am tired. Its amazing what you can get rid of when you arw trying to declutter the appearance of your home while making it liveable. I was amazed how games made it into at least 4 different places, toys and books in so many rooms and places. Marie kondo is onto something when she says to organize by like things versus by room. Huge difference in assessing what you have. And it makes a huge difference it how your house looks and feels.
And because pictures make things fun here are a few:
Our kitchen update
A little gem from our come follow me lesson the other night. It came from a scripture in Hebrews. Not letting our testimony become slippery and holding tight to the word of God so that we don't slip when hard times come...dad got an arm workout. 😁
Ta-ta for now.
I feel like I am more of a complete person when write and share my life. I have been sporadically writing in a journal but I never look at it and its not nearly as fun to look at without pictures. So I am once again going to attempt to blog again. Out of curiosity, is there anyone who isn't a professional blogger out there still?
So what to share?
I have been a member of the Y for a year and a half and I can say I have improved my running, mostly in the last 11 months, from a slightly 9 something minute down to 8 1/2 minute mile. Yay! Still working on running for longer. Slowly but surely. I can at least say I don't hate it and that I don't feel like my heart is going to race right out of me.
We are contemplating finding a bigger house. We found we like but there a few things holding us back. Until we ready we went into full get the house ready to sell mode. I am tired. Its amazing what you can get rid of when you arw trying to declutter the appearance of your home while making it liveable. I was amazed how games made it into at least 4 different places, toys and books in so many rooms and places. Marie kondo is onto something when she says to organize by like things versus by room. Huge difference in assessing what you have. And it makes a huge difference it how your house looks and feels.
And because pictures make things fun here are a few:
Wednesday, August 9, 2017
After Pregnancy
It's been one week since I've been pregnant and it feels so freeing despite the slow return of my body. I feel like the tummy pouch went down faster but I am older and even last time my doctor said I would need a tummy tuck. I hope *hope* I can avoid having a pouch or surgery.
My ankles have almost returned...still a little swollen but not swollen. I get weird little puffs on the inside of my ankles when I'm pregnant (reflexology says that's your uterus, so it makes sense). My fingers and toes are fatter..sadly I don't think they are swollen either. That just might be fat. I can't get my wedding ring on.
I'm finally starting to get nursing neck and shoulders. Ughh. I know I'll get stronger or if I just have better posture while nursing I'll be fine. But I exercised, I use that term incredibly loosely, I moved my body and arms around just loose them up...more of an active stretch??? I don't know if I can hold out until 6 weeks to exercise. I'm proud to say that I exercised the day Baby L was born...once again it was an easy quick one given time and motivation that day.
Today is GG's first full day back at work. It was wonderful having him home. He was the ideal husband and father that week. He cleaned, he bathed, he entertained, he shopped, he was patient and the list could go on. It was simply the best. I could spend my time taking care of Baby L and taking care of my body's needs. The first day home was perfect in that I could nap when he napped and just hold and adore him. I know paternity leave doesn't technically exist for his work, but he took the time off anyway. I felt a little selfish but was lovely.
Little Miss #3, has come up with some new techniques this morning. The other girls were off playing, L was crying and I was trying to figure out how to soothe him . I had put a show in for her but she decided she wanted attention from me so she came over and started "hitting" (super soft) me and laughing. Oh golly. Then at lunch time, he was still crying, Little Miss #3 was angrily crying, I was trying to make lunch one handed and meet the requests of everyone. It was a chaotic few minutes and only the beginning.
Well, here's to a smooth adjustment phase!! OH Heaven help us! :)
My ankles have almost returned...still a little swollen but not swollen. I get weird little puffs on the inside of my ankles when I'm pregnant (reflexology says that's your uterus, so it makes sense). My fingers and toes are fatter..sadly I don't think they are swollen either. That just might be fat. I can't get my wedding ring on.
I'm finally starting to get nursing neck and shoulders. Ughh. I know I'll get stronger or if I just have better posture while nursing I'll be fine. But I exercised, I use that term incredibly loosely, I moved my body and arms around just loose them up...more of an active stretch??? I don't know if I can hold out until 6 weeks to exercise. I'm proud to say that I exercised the day Baby L was born...once again it was an easy quick one given time and motivation that day.
Today is GG's first full day back at work. It was wonderful having him home. He was the ideal husband and father that week. He cleaned, he bathed, he entertained, he shopped, he was patient and the list could go on. It was simply the best. I could spend my time taking care of Baby L and taking care of my body's needs. The first day home was perfect in that I could nap when he napped and just hold and adore him. I know paternity leave doesn't technically exist for his work, but he took the time off anyway. I felt a little selfish but was lovely.
Little Miss #3, has come up with some new techniques this morning. The other girls were off playing, L was crying and I was trying to figure out how to soothe him . I had put a show in for her but she decided she wanted attention from me so she came over and started "hitting" (super soft) me and laughing. Oh golly. Then at lunch time, he was still crying, Little Miss #3 was angrily crying, I was trying to make lunch one handed and meet the requests of everyone. It was a chaotic few minutes and only the beginning.
Well, here's to a smooth adjustment phase!! OH Heaven help us! :)
Saturday, July 29, 2017
Doing something right?
So sometimes my kids are handfuls and can be difficult. Little Miss #3 and her 2 year old independence had been rough. But then there are moments that make you feel like maybe you are doing something right. She came up to get diapers and wipes so dad could change her. I helped her since we had to put them up high (she has decided to help herself to her own diaper changes....fear and tremble.) But as I handed them to her she turned back at me and said s cute little "thank you" that made me we might be doing okay.
Wednesday, July 26, 2017
Just a wishin' and a hopin'
I was so hoping today was going to be the day for little man to come. But he sure didn't. Ah well. Induction date is set for next week ...unfortunately at 5:30 in the morning! seriously?! I'd rather go into labor in the middle of the night than be scheduled for 5:30. But whatever. Hopefully we don't make it to that date. I can't decide if I'm more ready for a break from my other kids for a day or two or to finally be done being pregnant.
I'm still not sure I know what I'm getting into. Here is a picture that I took that I sent to Victory when I found out I was pregnant....the feeling is about the same today as it was that day.
I'm going to be so outnumbered at home. Little Miss #3 has hit the terrible twos in full swing and I can't even deal with it. Little Miss #2 has always thrown tantrums but thankfully they seem even more petty than LM#3's tantrums and I can just let her cry even though its annoying. And Little Miss #2 is always picking on Boo. And Boo likes to do as she pleases or I have to ask her a billion times to do something. Ignoring me is her thing. And add a baby that will want to nurse, be held and need diaper changes. And hopefully I will want to cuddle and adore like I have my past babies to the point I don't want to be interrupted for frustrating things. I just want to soak it up.
Is that weird? That I fear that I won't have the same attachment that I have felt towards my girls? The idea of a baby boy seems so weird to me....I don't know why. I think I was a little worried or unsure how things would go with Boo, but after that I knew I just wanted to snuggle those sweet baby cheeks. Maybe it's because I have never experienced it with a boy so I'm unsure. I don't tend to fawn too much over other's babies and fawning over a baby boy is new territory.
Here is a picture of me at 37 weeks:
I'm still holding out hope that I'll go early this time...I haven't before but still worth hoping for?
'
I'm still not sure I know what I'm getting into. Here is a picture that I took that I sent to Victory when I found out I was pregnant....the feeling is about the same today as it was that day.
I'm going to be so outnumbered at home. Little Miss #3 has hit the terrible twos in full swing and I can't even deal with it. Little Miss #2 has always thrown tantrums but thankfully they seem even more petty than LM#3's tantrums and I can just let her cry even though its annoying. And Little Miss #2 is always picking on Boo. And Boo likes to do as she pleases or I have to ask her a billion times to do something. Ignoring me is her thing. And add a baby that will want to nurse, be held and need diaper changes. And hopefully I will want to cuddle and adore like I have my past babies to the point I don't want to be interrupted for frustrating things. I just want to soak it up.
Is that weird? That I fear that I won't have the same attachment that I have felt towards my girls? The idea of a baby boy seems so weird to me....I don't know why. I think I was a little worried or unsure how things would go with Boo, but after that I knew I just wanted to snuggle those sweet baby cheeks. Maybe it's because I have never experienced it with a boy so I'm unsure. I don't tend to fawn too much over other's babies and fawning over a baby boy is new territory.
Here is a picture of me at 37 weeks:
'
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)